Both sides now

I am reading a book called “The Theory of Clouds” by Stéphane Audeguy. It is, like much of what I like to read, a mix of fact and fiction and focuses on a history of cloud watching.

A section of the book  tells the story of the painter Carmichael (supposedly based on John Constable) and his obsession with capturing clouds in paint. I had always considered Constable a painter of mills and bucolic settings, but you can see from this google search the extent of his cloud paintings, just a few reproduced here.

cloud_study_by_john_constable_1822_tate_britain constable_cloudstudy_nga one-of-john-constables-cl-007constable_seascaoestudywithraincloud

The difficulty of capturing the cloud is discussed at length on “A Theory..” however now the camera captures clouds with more ease, which you see everywhere in photography from Aotearoa.

Laurence Aberhart. Catholic Cross, Puketapu, Hawke’s Bay, June 1982

On Walking

I have recently succumbed to the tyranny of the pedometer. I need to move and get outdoors because the winter gloom of Southern New Zealand affects me quite a lot and sun and exercise helps. Thing thing is…exercise. In my much younger days I climbed and tramped and the thought of “artificial exercise” eg the gym, chills me. I have friends who walk and I am a fan of flâneury on the page at least, see here and here. Related to this, some of my favourite books relate to psychogeography, brilliant examples being Martin Edmonds’  “Chronicle of the Unsung” and “Dark Night: Walking with McCahon“. More recently I discovered WB Sebald whose “Rings of Saturn” which I cannot recommend strongly enough.

So can I walk with purpose in my small town, and is it big enough that I can also wander? Initially I am being guided by the 1970s books “Taieri Buildings” and “More Taieri Buildings” by Lemon and Bascand, and am trying to locate all the buildings still there that are within the build up area. Sadly some, like the old Flour Mill (in this photo just before its demolition), have been reduced to gravel carparks.

Recently on a night walk I managed to circumnavigate, by accident, the grounds of what was Holy Cross College, a former seminary. This photo was taken around 1900 I am guessing, as a new chapel was built in 1902.

DCC Archives, postcard in Taieri County Council Photograph Series. Photographer: AW Bathgate

And today I took this – from a similar position. You can see a former convent just in front, now a house.

Poor phone camera photo taken today of same view.

So yes….more to walk and write about. I am also excited to compare urban, rural and small town journeys. In Rebecca Solnit’s “Wanderlust: A History of Walking” she writes “In the country one’s solitude is geographical – one is altogether outside society….In the city, one is alone because the world is made up of strangers, and to be a stranger surrounded by starkest…is among the starkest of luxuries”.

For most of last year I was immersed in geographic academia and geographical detail remains intriguing to me. This morning I chanced to hear just the beginning of a radio interview with Jake Gorst, director of Modern Tide, about modernist architecture on the East Coast of the US.. The first thing that struck me was his statement that Long Island was 100 miles long. I don’t know why this hadn’t registered with me in the past. But on reflection it makes sense, as many of my literary/arts favourites have some sort of connection to the island and yet I had never really connected.

Jackson Pollock lived and died there. The Pollock Krasner house in Springs in the Hamptons is now a study centre and museum of sorts.

Both Armistead Maupin and Edmund White’s (especially Forgetting Elena) stories of Fire Island.

Large parts of John Irving’s “Widow for One Year” takes place in the Hamptons also at Sagaponack. This is not an easy book but captures human nature so well like much of Irving’s writing

The wonderful book “Architect of Desire” about the infamous Stanford White was largely located at the Box Hill estate in Smithtown.

The decline of Box Hill led me to research the fading history of Long Island and I discovered this website about the mansions of Long Island and the architectural relics of its heyday.

The mansions of course bring us to one of the most know Long Island stories “The Great Gatsby” and I was surprised how close to New York in modern terms Gatsby’s Estate was. Wikipedia states that ” In this novel, Great Neck (King’s Point) became the new-money peninsula of “West Egg” and Port Washington (Sands Point) the old-money “East Egg”. Several mansions in the area served as inspiration for Gatsby’s home, such as Oheka Castle and the now-demolished Beacon Towers.

New Picture

Lou Reed’s Coney Island Baby and I am sure there are many many others….

Finally Rufus Wainright’s song Montauk is also a great favourite

Reading Women

As I’ve almost finished my thesis and it is summer, I’ve managed to do a bit of reading and re-reading.


Amongst the many books I’ve browsed through, a theme has emerged. These four mid 20th century American women have affected me deeply with their stories. The first thing that hit me was how much better off white middle class women are in the 21st century compared to white middle class women of the 1950s. But then I realised things haven’t changed so much. Women generally, and especially women who don’t “fit” still don’t have it easy.

What is interesting is these contemporaries (who I gather never met or if so only in passing) all had much in common and yet dealt with their reluctance to conform is such different ways.

One and Only is the story of Lu Anne Henderson, best know as Marylou from Kerouac’s “On the Road”. The missing female perspective on ‘the beats’ and the era can be found here. For this group Carolyn Cassady’s “Off the Road” is also a good one, but I found LuAnne’s story more touching and perhaps more honest. It also echoes a comment that I read somewhere recently (and now can’t find the source of but I think perhaps in John Clellon Holmes’ “Go“) that every generation thinks they invented a sexual revolution. Luanne wanted freedom and never really found it.

Alice Denham – July 1956 Playmate of the month, was the first (and only?) playmate to have a story published in the magazine alongside her centrefold. Denham because an adjunct professor of English and although she viewed sex as a “great adventure”, she used it and her body to get where she wanted to go and did reasonably well on it. Sex and brains, an irresistible combination! Her book “Sleeping with the Bad Boys” is well written, (although it could have been better edited) and flips between a tell all romp and  a sad description of another woman wanting to be recognised as an intellectual individual in the 1950s New York literary world run by white middle class men who simply didn’t want to know.

Joyce Johnson again is a female view of the beat scene. Her relationship with Jack Kerouac as “On the Road” was published is the focal point of the book but the more interesting part to me was again her struggle to write and be independent in 50s New York. The pain of the women being pushed to the back is so evident here – the cover photo is so revealing, as are others from that shoot. As the is the title “Minor Characters

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And then we come to Sylvia, who struggled and escaped and then when the carefully constructed ideal world she created fell apart, ended it all. I call her Sylvia because I’ve been working on a project related to her for 18 months or more and I feel I’ve got to know her.


The ideal world where she felt she had it all was  marriage and motherhood (like a good 50s girl should) and a literary life – with a loving literary husband in the English country side. This in spite of the advice a Smith professor gave her that the achieve a literary life for a woman at that time she must remain single or at least childless. However also the times meant marriage difficulties and she battled depression her whole adult life and I don’t need to say where it ended. My revelation has been her short stories in “Johnny Panic and the Bible of Dreams“. I think they reveal a lot about Plath that other works perhaps don’t. they are also more measured and avoid the hysteria of some of her more well know works.

I am still thinking about these women. Sadly I see and hear resonances of the stories everyday, repeated even now in 2015. We haven’t come as far as we might think ladies.

Land of Opportunity

When I was in Wellington recently, I started to wonder if my children were getting the opportunities and experiences in their little provincial town that a child of urban Wellington would get. Then I realised it’s about creating opportunities and providing experiences and sometimes stumbling across them.

I grew up in Invercargill and was recently reminded of my “wow it’s a big world out there moment”. When I was maybe 11 or 12, my older brother played me a “Walk on the Wild Side”, insisting on me wearing headphones to fully appreciate the backing vocals. I was instantly enamoured, but it was the lyrics that were the revelation…”shaved her legs then he was a she”….WHAT? Thanks Lou, you brought New York to suburban girl living at the end of the world.


I drag my kids around art galleries, museums, on road trips, to historic sites, bush walks, sports games, swimming lessons, play them Mum music (Iggy Pop). We talk about things in the micro and the macro. I try to bring the world into our home. For example, my 6-year-old loves Antiques Roadshow and Time Team, (my influence of course), but it has been suggested that the “nana gene” is strong in this one. One night recently she started talking to me about the patterns and glazes of medieval floor tiles and how you could date them…she obviously has had the opportunity to learn about this (and now I have found this [.pdf] for her on the web) I am happy to run with that.

Yes the internet (and it was also the hope once held for television) can open our eyes and educate but it also very easy to go down a particular rabbit hole in the internet universe. We can surround ourselves with agreeable people on social media creating a bubble that doesn’t challenge us, we can search out only games or pron or whatever. Like eating only the foods that we know and like, it is often not good for us to have a narrow diet.

We also need to recognise that for many children (and adults) opportunities just aren’t there, or people just don’t know how to use or recognise them. School of course is a great environment for when the opportunities and experiences aren’t available in the home and school trips can provide those ‘eyes wide open’ moments. It is sad when I find that some schools can’t provide such opportunities as all resources must go into the core curriculum. Our own schools ensure no one misses out, however this is just not an option in some areas.

This is why I was very happy to contribute to this initiative from the Dowse who are a LEOTC provider.

And yeah I suppose I could give money more locally or perhaps wider (eg UNICEF) but I just hope one kid gets to stand in front of some art and gasp or cry or be affected and have their world widened by this scheme.

Tusiata Buchanan-Falema’a with a work by Reuben Patterson she chose for Pic ‘n Mix, at the Dowse.

I am very lucky these days to be travelling a bit for work and last week I got to Wellington for two days.

I like visiting Wellington, not sure how I’d do living there again though. I had a lot of fun at the second hand book stores

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Nice to pick up some of David Merritt’s Landrover Press poems. There is something special about buying a single poem…..

Oh and the food…the food was wonderful and authentic and so much variety.

Sadly our National Gallery at Te Papa (yes I know) was closed for a rehang. I could have paid to see the the impressionist exhibition but I really was looking forward to seeing my old friends (McCahon, Clairmont etc). I was going to snark about this until several people reminded me that perhaps it wasn’t as awful as going to Paris to find the Louvre  or Musée d’Orsay closed. But still, but still.

However coming home is good and we are rich here in Dunedin in other ways. I also cannot deny my deep suburban-ness where I take pleasure in the look and smell of a freshly mown lawn.

Why I Backed the Bull

The amazing Christchurch Art Gallery is the gallery that could. It’s the gallery that still operates to an amazing level even when its closed.

It is the public gallery that has just managed to raise over $200,000 to bring Michael Parekowhai’s Chapman’s Homer permanently to Christchurch via the Pledge Me Back The Bull campaign.

So why did I, a resident of Dunedin, back the bull?

Well the artwork is awesome. Ok that is trite, I found this work deeply moving. It is so unsubtley strong but attenuated by the delicacy of a concert grand piano, albeit a bronze one. The bull is undoubtedly a strong statement and pianos can be either. In this case the strength to support a bull but also capable of calm and storm (videos feature another Parekowhai Piano). Christchurch seems to have taken this work to its heart.

Why Christchurch? Well they WANT it, in fact the Director of CAG, Jenny Harper, obviously wants it a lot.  The letter about my initial donation was hand signed (not a printed sig) and also had a personal note. That’s dedication. I ended up deciding to donate more. The CAG has always seemed to me intent on creating relationships with it’s audience. There is give and take and it has always felt personal and warm and truly invested. I don’t know how they managed this, but that is my relationship with CAG and I don’t even live in Christchurch. I am even a “Friend of the Gallery”….They are doing something very very right. It’s not that others don’t care, but many galleries have a ‘take us or leave us’ attitude, or something horribly one sided. I see change but I admit, my heart belongs to CAG.  And, after a loooong time I am finally able and very happy to give back to them. Also I can always visit…

Congratulations to the Christchurch Art Gallery and to Christchurch. And a huge pat on the back to staff but especially Jenny Harper, who wanted this to happen, and made it happen.


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